Relationships and more……..

Revati tried hard to find the key hole but the number of
drinks she had that evening were impairing her vision. After some struggle she
managed to open the door of her 5000 sq. feet duplex apartment at Malabar hill.
The motion sensors detected she was around and lights flashed as she looked
around the lavish living room, all things in order and at the right place. The 16
seater pure leather imported sofa and the huge crystal chandelier were as
lifeless as the Guido Daniele painting of the woman posed on a bench
overlooking Slizza river in Italy. She flung her Louis Vuitton bag on the
sofa and balanced her way leaving her stilettos on the way towards the bed
room.
Revati was a socialite wife of Raghu, V. N. Raghupati CEO of
Assureinvest a venture capitalist firm. A simple but sharp soul, Raghu was complete
opposite of his spouse. Punctual and a man of few words he had strong family
values. Their marriage happiness of 8 years was inversely proportional to Raghu’s
bank balance. This was the very reason Raghu preferred to spend more time at
work than return to an empty house.
Raghu at work was a no non-sense person and appreciated
intelligence over hard work. His new hire Deepshikha was just the dependable
resource Raghu was looking for. She had to be told little and she understood
her work well. Assureinvest was Deepshi’s third job in a career of 6 years. She
understood the pulse of the job market well and knew when to switch to get paid
better. Her sole motive was a higher figure on the salary slip and with her diligence
she knew how to get that. Deepshi and Gaurav met at business school and lost
their hearts to each other. Gaurav loved Deepshi’s sharpness and Deepshi purely
fell for Gaurav’s looks and his Salsa moves. Both tied the knot against parent’s
wishes and moved to a 3 bedroom flat at Goregoan. An Emi of 70,000 and a car
loan made Deepshi change her job often and Gaurav take up salsa classes after
work. Gaurav’s clientele were crème de la crème of Mumbai most of them
socialites including Revati. Gaurav and Deepshi’s 6 years of marriage became a
transactional relationship of money transfers to bank accounts and sticky notes
on the refrigerator the only way of communication between them.  Sometimes the messages were communicated by
Seema their maid who kept a set of house key to complete the house hold chores
without disturbing Gaurav who would return home past midnight.
Seema was with Deepshi since her marriage, she was
trustworthy but in a painful relation with Govind. Govind was Seema’s husband’s
friend and moved with her as a support after her husband died leaving two
children behind. Govind turned alcoholic and would rob Seema of all the money
she earned.  He had just landed an office
boy’s job when Deepshi referred him to Raghu in order to reduce Seema burden.
It was the evening of 16th March 2012 when Deepshi
was preparing for the quarterly audit with Govind moving busily out of Raghu’s
cabin taking signatures on relevant papers. It was around mid-night when
Deepshi entered Raghu’s cabin, he was sitting on the wide parapet of the office
his back facing an open window, his legs rested on an Osim massager chair with
a glass of Glenlivet in his hand. Deepshi reluctant turned to leave when Raghu
asked her to sit. She noticed the generally dressed in a suit Raghu today in a
shirt crumpled around the waist as if it was pulled hard. His eyes were red,
this was the first time she noticed the handsome man that Raghu was. His ruffled
hair, slight grey side locks, his strong arms showed under his sleeves rolled
till the elbow. Feeling uncomfortable with the silence she rose once again to
leave when the wheels of the chair which Raghu rested his feet on moved and he
lost his balance. Deepshi ran towards him and pulled his hand to stop him
from falling off the window. He fell on her triggering the dearth of physical
touch he had faced in the past years. He hugged her tight; Deepshi did not
resist and gave in to his dominance.
Seema rushed to the hospital as her son had fallen off stairs
and needed to be admitted. Not knowing where to go she reached Deepshi’s apartment
to ask for money. She opened the flat with the set of keys she had and rushed
in. Her pace slowed as she saw the stilettoes lying on the floor, as she moved
further she saw a Burberry evening gown flung on the ground, she understood
that wasn’t Deepshi’s.  She could hear
giggles and whispers from the bed room. Not knowing what to do, she decided to
leave when she glanced on the open bag on the dinning. She could see a
bundle of notes, she tip toed and grabbed the money and moved out to save her
son.
Flash forward….October 2013, Deepshi changed the music to classical
as Raghu started his Audi Q5. He grabbed Deepshi’s hand and kissed it before
buckling his seat belt. They reached the apartment; she waited in the car as
Raghu went to Revati’s 16th floor apartment to deliver the signed
divorce papers. He was about to ring the bell when he heard Gaurav and Revati
arguing over something. He chose to leave the papers at the door. On the way
back they dropped in at Seema’s to deliver the Diwali bonus. Now the 5000 sq.
feet house name plate reads Deepshi and Raghu’s. May be now it’s not just a
house, its home!
Will leave you with one of my favorite songs…
रिश्ते तोह नहीं रिश्तों की पर्छैयाँ मिले 
यह कैसी भीड़ है बस यहाँ तन्हाईयाँ मिले।
इक छत के तले अजनबी हो जाते हैं रिश्ते 
बिस्तर पे चादरों से चुप हो जातें है रिश्ते।
ढूंढे से भी इनमें नहीं गर्मियाँ मिले।
यह कैसी भीड़ है बस यहाँ तन्हाईयाँ मिले।
जिसको भी देखिये वो अधूरासा है यहाँ 
जैसे कहीं हो और वो आधा रखा हुआ।
हो जब जहाँ जुड़े वही जुदाइयाँ मिले 
यह कैसी भीड़ है बस यहाँ तन्हाईयाँ मिले।

Pre-Prem, Post-Prem……Real Prem??
(*prem is a Sanskrit word meaning love)
Telephone, cell phone, going mobile or being virtual has made the world such a small place……you reckon? I don’t.
30 CHF or 150 INR – 1 GB internet, 90 minutes and unlimited text messages free!!!!!! We have divided our love based on the cell phone scheme we have whether its prepaid or postpaid. Pre-paid scheme more text messages and less talk (messages are free you see). So you text your boyfriend all the time and mom who has failed to keep herself abreast with the short text language gets the few minutes if calling is free. Post-paid schemes….night calling at half rates!!! I haven’t got a better scheme yet dude. I can talk late nights with him and my family doesn’t stay awake late so I can spend the few minutes on high rate day calling on them. When was the last time you saw a self-written post card sent or received from your loved one? Missing the personal touch eh, the thought that he would have touched the same card that you are holding now or smelling his fragrance from the card reminding you of the intimacy you shared….fast forward, get to today’s world…what card…the e card?
The world really has got closer, you need not visit your relatives as you have video calling. You are glued to your laptop when working, blackberry to receive and send emails with zero time lapses and of course the Xbox….you need to unwind after a day’s work. Asking my dad on what would he do after his office and he would get the glitter in his eyes and say all the friends would meet below the apartment daily post dinner and chitchat, share happy and sad moments and advice each other. Over weekends it was cricket at the local street and all would look forward to it as the losing team would treat the winning one. What life man!!! And here I am spending on all the expensive gadgets to keep myself busy and still get depressed at the end of the week.
Now talking of the more advanced world …..Our self-made ecosystem…..our virtual world, the face books and messengers of the world. The good part is you get in touch with those whom you thought would never meet you in life, you also meet those whom you choose to be friends with without the boundaries of appearance and status.
But I want to draw your attention to the funnier side of being virtual and what I think when I read these……
LOL(laugh out loud) – when was the time you even laughed forget being loud…..i heard you have joined the laugh club where in each morning you go to a garden and pretend to laugh till your intestines blast….
ROFL (Roll on the floor and laugh)……I really want to see you do that….that would ensure I LOLJ
AFAIC or AFAICT – (As far as I am concerned/tell)….i could type the words faster than the acronym
AFB – (Away from brain)….when were you last thereJ
I can leave you thinking with the rest AISB, AMF, AWS and AYT……
Well not being too sarcastic and I agree we don’t have a lot of personal time, I wouldn’t even deny that our gen guys have more competition at work, put in longer hours, have complex business situations to deal with but given a deeper thought I believe and agree that people who think life is bigger than family or job or yourself am sure will give you a different perspective. I would leave you with this thought that we all have been given the same gift called “life” and differences in life between two individuals are a result of the choices he makes. So if I make a choice that I want to live my life to the fullest without pulling restrictive goals of managing a company, making babies, owning property or doing charity…I would still be happy. For me…it’s a journey…full of surprises and knowing myself better and thus Life’s Like That!!!!
PS- The next time you want to speak to a friend who is closer…just walk over to him don’t get to digital emotions. 

Ani….The Girl Next Door!

“Can you repeat the drink and make it on the rocks” she said in a dejected feeble voice looking away from the bartender. She thought that in the journey she had lost the woman she once was, aggressive, confident and full of life. “Mam here’s your drink, would you like something to eat too” she did not answer to the bartender’s question. She was lost in the thoughts of what had been happening for the past one year. She loved him, had become very dependent on him and he loved her too but his anger had no bounds. She was high after her fourth drink but still the evening scar was fresh in her mind. She still remembered the fight they had in the car on the busy streets of Mathura road. “How can you not speak to your parents about us? They got you engaged, you said nothing and still you don’t want to speak to them about us? What do I ask for just us being together, just your hand. This has been going on for six months now.” Rohan’s rage was not a surprise to Ani. They had been together for 3 years now. But since she had been engaged to her parents’ wishes things had been worse. “I hate you for the way you are. Women like you who cannot make decisions have no right to live.” Tears rolled from Ani’s eyes she said nothing and as the car stopped at the signal she quietly got down.” She crossed over to the other side not noticing the speeding car through her tearful eyes. The car braked hard just missing her by an inch. The driver rolled the window to shout out “why are you using my car to die, there are other ways too, try those.” She looked at him and moved away.

“Mam here’s your phone, the charger is not working, and the battery is breathing its last.” Ani was brought to the present by the bartender. She took at the phone and kept aside and sipped the last bit of the drink left in her glass. “rrrrepeaat pleassse” is all she could say. The bartender cautioned her “Mam I suggest you shouldn’t have more, how will you go home?” Ani smiled and thought why would she go home now? She was here so that she could not be in her senses and be brave enough to end her life. It would pain less then she wondered. Rohan found her meek and unwanted, her parents did not understand her and there was no motive to go on further she thought. She picked her mobile and started reading the text messages. They were the only support that would bring her back when Rohan fought with her. He would then send a message apologizing for his hot temper and saying nice things to her. There were no messages this time though it had been six hours since she got down from the car. She clicked on new message and typed “your worry is over now” and sent flashed on the mobile. She sipped the drink as she was ready for what she had come to this dingy bar in Khan Market for. She couldn’t imagine that Rohan and she had spent hours at the Barista opposite this bar whispering sweet nothings to each other and today she was here to see her last bit. The phone beeped and Rohan messaged “where are you, I hope you are not at some ……….” The cell phone battery died.

The bar was abuzz now and people were staring at the pretty woman at the corner table sitting alone. Ani had given up on things but was not aware of the consequences could be. She was almost five drinks down and was not in a position to look around. Her head had started pounding hard and the rock music was hitting her badly. The stout bar owner was observing her from the last three hours and now knew that she wouldn’t take more. The group of young boys who just entered wanted the table and so he gestured the bartender to ask her to vacant the table. The bartender politely asked her if she would like to order something to eat. He was aware of how fast she has drunk. He was also aware that her mobile had given up and she was in no state to go home, he too was on duty and couldn’t do much. Ani instead asked for the cheque. She couldn’t read the amount on the bill, she dug her hand in the large purse she carried and pulled her hand out. It was the bottle of sleeping pills she had purchased in the evening telling the chemist she will get the prescription in half an hour. After a lot of effort she placed a thousand rupee note and tried to get up. She dropped on the seat. She again tried and got up. She felt extremely dizzy and nauseatic and could barely place her feet firm on the floor. The bar was dark and as she moved to the staircase, she held the railing and tried to concentrate on the steps. The stout bar owner followed her. The staircase was narrow and the bar owner stood behind her and whispered, where do you stay? Should I drop you home?”

Ani had a shocked expression when she turned towards him. She in one minute realized what trouble she was in and the consequences could be rude. She wanted to hurry and run towards the last step and out of the door but her senses gave way. She held the railing tight, her palms sweaty as she stepped down, the bar owner following her. The minute she opened the door there was gush of cool breeze that wrapped her. She missed a step on the road and fell on her knees. The bar owner had now closed in was about to pick her up as she muttered ‘please don’t’. She now knew she was in trouble and she wanted to end her life but not fall into wrong hands. The street was filled with people who had come to unwind after a day’s hard work and Ani was trying to make her way through the people. High alcohol consumption can disrupt the brain’s judgement of distances and heights. Same was Ani’s state at this time. She could see people looking at her and she was not finding it decent. Just try to cross the street and hopefully an auto could take me to my hostel she told herself. Now another group was passing comments on if they would take her where she wanted to go. Ani was not just awkward but also vulnerable and helpless as she had no control on herself.

She tried to hurry before the men closed in. They almost circled her on the end of the street. She had tears rolling and from the corner she was the white Santro DL2C ADXXXX with the door wide open. She saw Rohan rush towards her and push people aside saying she is with me, move away. He grabbed her in his arms and she held her shirt and burst in tears. He was the support she was trying to cling on to in order to get her feet firm on the road. He quickly made her sit in the car and got behind the wheel speaking aloud, “Do you know what I have gone through from the time I got your text message to reaching here. What if my gut feel would have been wrong. Do you realize you are so valuable to me? How could you even do this?”

She was almost unconscious as she knew she was in the safest hands in the world and just kept blabbering “I love you Rohan”

You may think if this is a movie part or a novel chapter….i think just one thing…Life’s Like That….

MEN ARE LIKE RUBBER BANDS!!

John Gray in his book Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus talks of men having an intimacy cycle which is much like a rubber band….

“they instinctively pull away. It is not a decision or a choice. It just happens. It is neither his fault nor her fault. It’s a natural cycle”

I agree with Gray on men being like rubber bands but it is not his decision or choice……nor his fault….dude is in serious misconception there!

Am sure all my women friends will have a déjà vu feeling when they hear the words…I am blank…a standard connotation used by the rightly called rubber bands  Interestingly my interpretation goes that men pull back as much as they can and then get reminded….some things would require mademoiselle and thus the rubber band is back to position!

So to be more precise John Gray also describes that men who are habitually insensitive or unavailable and who come to women when they need an ego boost or in his words get generally to get his needs met (mostly emotional) without fulfilling her needs…. here he got it right again but I see a different pattern now…

In these changing times we all, both men and women can have phases of being less tolerant and emotionally insensitive. With the high divorce rates and break-ups sky rocketing it is very natural to not be able to emotionally engage with someone on a healthy level for long periods of time.

For me it’s about foundation….the stone on which the relationship is based…if that stepping stone is strong…..let the rubber band stretch… it will surely come to position. Whatever we say both the sexes fail to exist without each other and for once let us women too agree…they aren’t that bad…it’s all on us to recognize if it’s not being a rubber band that comes back only to get the way and back again or a rubber band that stretches so much that breaks.

The argument continues……..

I will leave you on the fence with this liner from fml: ‘Today, my friend told me men can’t be trusted. I told her that wasn’t true; I have my husband’s password to his email but I never check it because I trust him. She bet me he was doing something bad, and to prove her wrong I looked. Turns out he has been cheating on me for 8 months’

Thoughts anyone……